The unrealistic expectation that young people have is what often contributes to the failure of their relationship.After being "involved" with a person for a time, and then breakiing up and going through the feelings of remorse or loneliness and unhappiness, and then moving on to the next "relationship" and then another break-up, hard feelings, sadness and then yet another series of dating, hanging out, breaking up and so on." prior to marriage, falling in love, arguing, breaking up and then going through the sad feelings and repeating this over and over, are much more likely to end up in a very rough marriage and very possible divorce.This was not there in North America before the Second World War.The women used to wear long chaste dresses and their dating did not involve the close intimacy that we see today.The choice of a marriage partner is one of the most important decisions a person will make in his or her lifetime.It should be taken as seriously as any other major decision in life - with prayer, careful investigation, and family involvement.There is no room in Islam for illicit affairs or the Western vogue-word of boyfriend and girlfriend.All those stories of media and movies are not helpful to make a person comply with the teachings of Islam.
In Islam consent is very important- that is neither women nor men can be married against their will.
We have been in this love relationship for one year.
I know this person and his family, and they know us well as well.
(Lawful to you in marriage) are chaste women from the believers and chaste women from those who were given the Scripture (Jews and Christians) before your time, when you have given their due mahr (bridal money given by the husband to the wife at the time of marriage), desiring chastity (i.e., taking them in legal wedlock), not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girlfriends.
And whosoever disbelieves in the Oneness of Allaah and in all the other Articles of Faith, the fruitless is his work, and in the Hereafter he will be among the losers.” [al-Maa’idah 5:5] Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Muhsineen ghayr musaafiheen wa laa muttakhidhi akhdaan (‘desiring chastity (i.e., taking them in legal wedlock), not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girlfriends’).